This is the third and final scene (until I decide otherwise) I'm sharing from the screenplay I wrote a few years back. This particular dream sequence signals the story's climatic showdown. The number one rule when writing description in any script is that it must be VISUAL. If you can see it on the page, then so can a paying audience.
INSIDE SKYLAR’S HEAD (PART FLASHBACK/PART FANTASY)
Falling through the eye of Skylar’s mind, all fades to black as the beginnings of a wail slowly starts to take shape in the form of an incoherent and dreamlike image of Skylar being wheeled into surgery. He moves his head from side to side in terrified protest. His open mouth begins to release the volcanic pressure inside his soul. No notice is made as medical personnel already masked prepare his scalp for surgery.
The scream continues to build as an immobilized Skylar (mouth open throughout) looks on in terror as cellophane is wrapped around his face. The terror mounts as he looks up through a watery veil of cellophane, up at the common steel faucet drowning him. As before, no notice of his presence is taken.
The scream is unmistakable as his open eyes and mouth wail powerless against a surgeon, yanking an evil looking abrader through flesh and bone and human skull.
Now in a hospital bed, his eyes, dilated and fervid, stare up into the barrel of a pistol aimed right between his eyes. The howl reaches crescendo.
PRESENT TIME
Skylar’s face hardens.
SKYLAR
Burn with me.
And so the showdown begins like the universe: violently explosive.
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Thursday, October 4, 2012
My Trips to the Store
My trips to my local HEB are usually routine and prosaic. I mean how exciting can grocery shopping be? Well, today it proved a tad eventful while picking up some cans of soup, bread, tuna---the usual prosaic items. However I noticed this sale of 6-pack, bottled Snapple on display. Something that my HEB doesn't carry every day. But what really stood out was the buy-two-get-two-dollars-off coupon. Hmm, well I really love peach Snapple, and since I've cut out sodas, I intended to snag a pair. Problem
was that intention was on Sunday. And so today while picking up the cans of
soup, bread, tuna---the usual prosaic items, I noticed that enticing display of
Snapple was gone. That’s when I did something I don't normally do at a grocery
store: I persisted. Which is where my adventure began.
Persisting, I stopped and asked a clerk if they still had any Snapple left. He didn't know, but he kindly checked with a manager. Between them they confirmed what I already knew: there wasn’t any Snapple to be found on display. But the manager had someone check in back. Sure enough he found some. Hurray! But I couldn't take any right then because I can only carry so many cans of soup, bread, tuna and the usual prosaic items home. (That's the truly wonderful benefit of having a car---a benefit I no longer possess.) So I said I would be back in half an hour to get them, which was fine with them. So I checked out my cans of soup, bread, tuna and the usual prosaic items and lugged my bags home. Then I returned to the store (I live only .7 of a mile away; a fortunate benefit when one no longer owns a car), and snagged my pair of peach Snapple using my $2 off coupon. However I wanted to get FOUR packs of Snapple (I couldn't be sure when the next time my HEB would have them in stock, let alone on sale---a suspicion I felt confirmed by their removal from display). This meant I would have to return AGAIN for the next pair. But as it turned out, I didn't have a coupon for another pair. Not deterred, I once more persisted: I asked if they had any coupons left. Upon which the guy who fetched my Snapple told me I could get one at check-out from the cashier. The cashier however told me she didn't have any, but she called another employee over. That employee said she could print one, but it would "take a minute". Ten minutes later a manager came out with enough coupons for every customer in the store. Somehow he had gotten the impression I wanted to buy the whole pallet. Wow, who knew managers possessed mental powers of mind-reading. But sensibly I recognized that my insatiable desire for Snapple was greater than my pocketbook allowed. So I settled on the one coupon. That mission now accomplished, I lugged my bottled prize, one in each arm, home. Then I returned once more to my HEB (third trip in case you were getting lost), and snagged my SECOND pair of 6-pack, bottled Snapple. (Kudos to the guy in dreadlocks---he actually made them look good---who went back into the bowels of the store THREE times: first to confirm that yes, they still had some left; and twice to fetch me some. He even gave me another coupon...Huh, wish he would've given me that earlier; I wouldn't have had to wait ten minutes while a manager printed like a gazillion of them for me on my previous trip.) Nevertheless, thankful for the extra $2 coupon (this time I decided I would save it for another day), I checked out of the store, lugging my second and final pair of Snapple home one last time.
In retrospect I figure I walked nearly four and a half miles
over three trips (two and a quarter of which involved lugging sacks of prosaic
groceries and multiple bottles of peach Snapple), received assistance from half
a dozen people, and walked away with a more than average memorable story for what
started out as an ordinary trip to the store.
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